Category Archives: Christian Marriage
In the messy aftermath of learning that two dear friends are struggling with their marriage, Christian couples tend to come face to face with the all-important question: how does a person keep the marriage flame alive, through the years of, say, finding each other’s faults, being faced with the temptation of someone else being more attractive, or even something legitimate as parenting several kids, having them grow up and leave home? How does Christian marriage stay vibrant and alive even through the challenges of everyday life?
I suppose it’s never as clear-cut as simply giving someone (or myself, for that matter) a set of guidelines as to how to keep the flame alive. It’s never an issue of how a person ought to behave in order to keep his or her partner in love, or growing in love. It’s also not an issue of how to keep from becoming child-centered in one’s parenting technique, of prioritizing Christian marriage above parenting one’s own offspring. And it surely is not an issue about keeping each other securely tethered to protect the bond of marriage.
Most likely, you find this title weird, particularly in this kind of website: Christian marriage, top priority when we’re here to talk about parenting? I don’t have a problem with my marriage, I’m here to learn how to take care of my baby, you may think. It’s OK, I hear you! Interestingly, majority of individuals, whether believer or not, are faced with this important question: when the children come, where does the marriage go?
Of course, I’m not talking about single moms at this particular time. I believe the Lord gives grace for single parenting, but allow us to address the topic of Christian marriage in the context of family. I admit, like you, I never really thought much about prioritizing marriage with the thought of a baby coming along. It seems that society teaches us that when the baby comes, the mom and dad are supposed to forget themselves and wait on the baby hand and foot. While this has some merit in terms of true unconditional self-sacrificing love, there apparently has to be a certain balance to aim for.